Rape, Sex and Society 

RAPE: A consequence of existent sexual taboo and unnatural moral policing

It has been confirmed that Bhagirathi Bhatta of Baitadi was murdered after being raped. At present, various groups have started agitation demanding identification of the culprits and action to be taken against them. The police have said that they are looking for the culprit and investigating the incident.

Though it has been confirmed that Nirmala Pant of Kanchanpur was raped and murdered two years ago, the police have not been able to find the culprit yet. The Nirmala murder case was discussed from the streets to the House. This caused a stir in the police organization itself. Various non-governmental organizations and campaigners made this incident a big agenda.

If the culprit is not found soon, it is certain that the Bhagirathi murder case will lead to the same outcome. There will be a movement in the name of Bhagirathi. A campaign will be launched on justice for Bhagirathi. Gradually, however, the protestors will get tired. The movement will die down. When another girl or woman is raped or assaulted again, Bhagirathi will be discussed again, like Nirmala is now!

There are many incidents of rape that occurred between Nirmala’s and Bhagirathi’s case. Some were reported and covered by the mainstream media, some were not. There are other incidents of murder after rape. There may be countless incidents of rape that have not been made public, that have been suppressed, that have not been reported, and also those of murder after rape. 

Why? Because there is no shortage of ground for such crimes in our social system. 

If the culprit is not found soon, it is certain that the Bhagirathi murder case will lead to the same outcome as Nirmala’s; there will be a movement in the name of Bhagirathi. A campaign will be launched on justice for Bhagirathi. Gradually, however, the protestors will get tired. The movement will die down. When another girl or woman is raped or assaulted again, Bhagirathi will be discussed again, like Nirmala is now!

So now, we need to look at trends, patterns and psychosocial reasons, not event-centered ones. Why does someone rape? It is necessary to think and act in a way that breaks the foundation and basis of rape itself.

Some time ago, news was heard that a rapist who raped a buffalo was arrested in Morang. This news made readers ponder for a long time. As soon as I read it, I thought, ‘Why are people so cruel? Why are people losing their conscience and self-control? Why is society becoming so aggressive?’

But then, I corrected myself, ‘Why is society making people so cruel?’ This question kept running through my mind.

After thinking for a long time, I came to the conclusion, ‘Our society is producing rapists. The system itself is contributing to rape. No one wants to be a rapist.’

The concern was less about buffalo rape incident and more about the increased number of rapes of women in our society. ‘Rape of girl by elderly, Murder after gang rape, Rape of a daughter by father, Murder after rape of a girl on the way to the toilet’ – similar news are being heard every day. Such news shakes people’s minds. Inferiority is felt over being born as a male. The Nirmala and Bhagirathi murder cases are only representative cases.

I saw a tweet a few days ago. It read, ‘Rape is not done by men, it is done by rapists.’ This tweet, by a woman, was uplifting to an extent. However, complete satisfaction cannot be felt.

Until recently, I would think, ‘Rape has increased because this society is patriarchal. Many consider rape to be a display of masculinity and consider women as an object for consumption. Many do all sorts of things to quench their sexual thirst. They can even rape and kill to satisfy their longing. This used to make me think, ‘Why was I born as a man?’ But I do not feel this way now. I support the tweet, ‘Rape is not done by men, it is done by rapists.’ 

Of course, masculinity dominates our social system. In the name of religion, men have always ruled over women. Referring to culture and tradition, rules have been made in such a way that entire lifestyles ranging from labor, remuneration, transportation should be patriarchal.

Women are forced to follow the rules made by men. Disobedient women are called obscene and characterless. However, this is not the only reason for the increase in rape.

Rape, Sex and Society 

Rape is directly related to sex. There are very few reports of men being raped by women. It is common for men to rape women. Now the natural question arises – why do men rape? Just to quench your sexual thirst? If yes, no man with a wife at home should ever rape. Is it because of the mentality of ‘anything can be done to a woman’? This shouldn’t be the case. 

In fact, our society makes every effort to render sex more mysterious. Where there is more mystery, there is more effort to dig in. This is human nature, and has helped increase rape.

Although sex is a natural biological process, it has been associated to character and discipline. Marriage is forced to be taken as permission to have sex. Men and women are expected to suppress sexual desire. Suppression of any desire too much turns into frustration. The peak of the same heightened frustration is rape. Thus, rape can be considered an outburst of frustration, to an extent. 

Why did I not become a rapist? 

Our society, religion, culture and tradition should make me a rapist too. In a sense, I have no reason to not be a rapist. However, I am not a rapist. 

I am not a rapist because my mind and body are controlled by a strong conscience. Although my mind and brain may have raped a lot, I have not physically raped due to control of my conscience.

Many now argue that rape should be eradicated by tightening the law. Rapists should be punished. But I don’t agree that hanging a rapist can stop rape. Merely taking action against perpetrators does not reduce crime. We need to build a society in which rape itself does not occur. We need to build a society void of rape. We need to develop such thinking. 

It is said, ‘The lock is not for the thief, it is for the gentleman.” YES – a small lock will not be an obstacle for a thief to steal. If he has to steal, he will steal anyway.

What needs to be considered is, who created the situation in which they had to steal? If they are given a job or guaranteed a comfortable and beautiful life without stealing, why would they steal? Would anyone want to steal? The same is true of rape. It is not necessary to tighten the law, it is necessary to develop a situation and mentality through which rape does not have to occur. 

Why don’t animals rape? 

Animals other than humans probably do not rape. We haven’t seen animals being raped by other animals. They have consensual sex based on biological needs.

However, people rape. Because people have the illusion that they are the supreme and superior creatures. Many rules have been made on the basis of the same illusion. Within the law, oneself, one’s desires, one’s mind, one’s conscience are imprisoned. People cannot accept anything beyond the scope they have created. Rape is the result of the inability to accept this, combined with suppressed desires and feelings. 

Heinous crimes such as rape are also being committed because premarital sex or extramarital sex is considered a crime. People go against nature in the name of consciousness and awareness. There are probably no animals more opposing towards nature than humans. By tying natural desires to the chains of law, people themselves are miserable and suffering. Rape is a result of the same sorrow and pain. 

Sex: Exploitation or Nourishment? 

Sex is an essential process for every living being, which is considered a matter of satisfaction and enjoyment along with its reproductive functions. Sexual desire begins with physical development. Yet, our society considers premarital sex to be a sin.

There is nothing in the world that is wrong if used well, and nothing right if misused or used negatively. Therefore, it is possible to build a rape-free society by associating sex only with physical need and as a biological and reproductive process.

Heinous crimes such as rape are also being committed because premarital sex or extramarital sex is considered a crime. Rape would be reduced if it were accepted as natural to have consensual and safe sexual intercourse between the aged and desired. However, our society is committing more crimes by exaggerating sex, which is essential for the body, and making it bigger than it naturally is.

Sexual nourishment can be based on desire and need. However, in a frustrated society where sex has been made a crime, sexual exploitation has become a topic to be discussed. There is nothing in the world that is wrong if used well, and nothing right if misused or used negatively. Therefore, it is possible to build a rape-free society by associating sex only with physical need and as a biological and reproductive process.

In a nutshell, we should build a society where rape does not exist. Never again may any woman suffer the same fate as Nirmala and Bhagirathi!  

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